I have previously said that the Brits love to tell stories. They'll tell you a story at the drop of a hat! On our recent Storytelling Tour to England, that happened a lot. Often they would recognize that we were American and would want to interact. Often, they would just want someone to interact with, to talk with, to tell their story to.

But if people don't initiate conversation on their own, the storyteller can be the catalyst for opening up a whole world of stories from mere strangers. On a bus, or in a restaurant, just ask someone where they are going, or where they are from to start the ball rolling. Secondary and tertiary questions can follow, in order to delve deeper and elicit more of their story. Most people are dyeing to tell you their story; they are just waiting to be asked.

I recently ran across a TED talk about the Art of the Interview by Marc Pachter, who has conducted live interviews with some of the most intriguing characters in recent American history as part of a remarkable series created for the Smithsonian's National Portrait Gallery. Although some of his talk is about what makes for a great interviewee, he shares that our role as the interviewer is to draw out the "life force" of the person we are interviewing. He says that "The key is empathy because everybody in their lives is really waiting for people to ask them questions, so that they can be truthful about who they are and how they became what they are."

There are other, tangible benefits to merely turning to a stranger and asking a question. I am often amazed that people can sit next to each other on a plane (for nine hours across the Atlantic) and barely speak two words to each other. But many have agreed with me that when they do speak, amazing things can happen.

On a plane home from England several years ago, I engaged a woman next to me in great conversation (for almost nine hours). Among other things, she was a kindergarten teacher in Cambridge, England and the following year, I visited and told stories to her class and four other classes and it was a marvelous experience!

So, don't always be so eager to tell someone your story...ask them about theirs!
 
View the TED talk here